Each child grieves the death of a significant person in his or her own way. Reactions can vary according to age, ability to understand death, and personality, and children in the same family may react differently. Any death can be difficult for a child, and a wide range of emotional and behavioral responses are common including changes in sleeping pattern or appetite; sad, angry, or anxious feelings; social isolation; persistent thoughts about the death; or feeling the person's presence nearby. Children’s difficulties with grief vary according to a child’s age, developmental level, previous life experiences, emotional health before the death, and family and social environment.
Some children develop traumatic grief responses, making it harder for them to
Any thoughts of the person—even happy ones—can lead to upsetting images or memories of the way that person died. These images may occur repeatedly in the child’s mind and—because they are so upsetting—the child may avoid thinking or talking about the person or even going places or doing things associated with the person or the death. Traumatic reactions may exacerbate existing mental health issues, disrupt learning, and be misinterpreted by parents, teachers, and others.
Difficulties specific to childhood traumatic grief that may occur across developmental stages include the following:
In childhood traumatic grief, the interaction between trauma and grief symptoms is such that any thoughts or reminders, even happy ones, about the person who died can lead to frightening thoughts, images, or memories of how the person died.
Three types of reminders may trigger distress in children experiencing childhood traumatic grief: